Life sure gets tough at stages and I reached a place where I didn't quite know what to make of it. When life changed on me ruthlessly and I was thrown off the track trying to get back in the right direction, I realised that I just needed to take a step back, and take a good look at it. Initially I stared at it, stared at in dismay where I found no accordance, and it made me wonder and curse. As a little while passed me by I looked at it and introspected a bit, objectively, may I add, and gained insight and then wondrous, learnings and realisations began to appear. Like I convinced myself the last time about time, I stuck to it. Still stuck even though like ordinary glue and not fevicol, but I'm trying desperately hard to hold on. Time has made a lot of those 'oh so terrible things' just seem so irrelevant.
I've had a change of philosophy with this experience. A big change. You cannot do anything about what's not in your control. There's no use thinking and worrying of 'What's going to happen when...' It's stark pointless! It's finally started making sense to me. I've soaked it up. It's cut down on a whole lot of stress and doesn't make me want to read the Pune Times horiscopes anymore. And I feel this change is here to stay. All that is in our control is to seize today and I'd even push myself to say seize now. There's just no use being afraid or worrying about the unknown, which I always used to fret about a lot.
I'm really at crossroads and I'm not even at the wheel to choose. But a friend who's in a constant state of zen has told me to just try and leave it to uncertainty cause it's fun! There used to be a time when I was more spontaneous, when bitterness of the day was allowed only a Cinderella deadline. Those were better, simpler times and I'm working on getting them back. I hope I can get them back.
Also Shelly made me listen to this song by Ricky Martin, yes Ricky Martin. I know what you're thinking but just listen to it will you? (Maybe you already have, cause I have no idea how popular this song is) I want to shout it out loudly! Especially on a day like today.
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:) Nice! Shalome was also the one who(she probably won't remember but still...) told me that.." good things come to those who wait"..n it works :) :)
ReplyDeleteWe have so many of those people who have helped us in the littlest ways but they have no clue about it! :)
ReplyDeleteI have to learn to practice what I preach Sonia! Thank you for reminding me!
ReplyDeletePranjali, you are well on your way to happiness and peace! Muah!
:) <3
ReplyDelete=) I love that song! and I love all of the above including comments! =D
ReplyDeleteMuah!
I feel like there's a sense of power that comes from not knowing whats next..it means the world's your oyster and u can make ur future what u want it to be...such a well written post! I loved it! :)
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